


Spiderman: Rebuilding Home

by ABlackRaven



Category: Far from home - Fandom, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Spider-Man: Far From Home (Movie), Tony Stark Lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-10
Updated: 2019-07-30
Packaged: 2020-06-25 16:59:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19749949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABlackRaven/pseuds/ABlackRaven
Summary: What if Tony Stark didn't die? What if when Peter calls for backup in Far From Home, Happy's not the only one on the quinjet?But what if Aunt May died? What kind of life would that leave Peter facing?“How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand... there is no going back? There are some things that time cannot mend. Some hurts that go too deep, that have taken hold.”-J.R.R Tolkien





	1. Hope

Peter didn’t know what he expected in that field. He called Happy clinging to any hope he could find. The nightmare had to stop eventually, right? There had to be a way to fix this, right? As the quinjet landed, he wanted to see it as a beacon of hope. He wanted to believe the nightmare was over. 

And yet as he limped across that field, Peter didn’t allow himself to be hopeful. He remembered too vividly that moment where he’d been optimistic on Titan they could win, only to have it snatched away. He remembered to vividly the pain that followed. 

_ It could still be an illusion. It could still be an illusion. It could still be an illusion. It could still-- _

“Peter?” The sound of Tony’s voice stopped him in his tracks. He looked up, tried to look his mentor in the eyes, and couldn’t. 

All he could see when he looked at Tony now was the blood. His mind turned to Thanos, to the horrible sound as Tony was stabbed. His mind turned to the aftermath of the battle, dust still hanging in the air, and Tony’s arm lying useless and destroyed at his side. They weren’t sure if he was going to survive. 

His mind turned to the illusions that had caged him in. Tony was dying again and again, and all Peter could hear was this voice telling him that it was all his fault. All my fault. 

Guilt. It was a crushing weight, like the grief that surrounded him every second of every day since he came back. It was not unlike being trapped underneath the warehouse again, unsure if he would survive. Tony gave him the Legacy AI hoping he could do some good with it in the world. Now it was in the hands of a mad man. 

_ Some Avenger I make.  _

“Kid?” Tony took a step forward, and Peter felt himself wincing. 

“Stop!” He felt himself shouting, not sure how his voice was working. He could hear the tremble in it, the weakness. “How do I know you’re real?” 

Tony was quiet for a moment, then he carefully took off his sunglasses. “Peter, look at me.” He looked up, tried to believe he was really there, that he was really okay. He couldn’t find the strength to trust reality. “A year after we met, you started coming over to the compound on weekends. At first, it was supposed to be just so you could work on your suit and get some basic training, but then there was the first movie night. Then there was the 50th movie night, and Rhodey was threatening to kill me if I let you put on Star Wars again.” 

Peter met his eyes. His mind was running away from him, trying to remember a hundred different memories at once. 

“One day, we were taking a break in the lab, and you took this stupid Buzzfeed quiz about which you were.” Tony continued, taking a slow step forward. “When Tony Stark showed up as your result you got this huge smile on your face. I couldn’t believe anyone could be happy about being compared to me. And yet you were.” 

Tears ran down his face, and he wanted to instantly tell himself that he was weak, that he was a coward. And yet, somewhere, he remembered the little giggle that came up as Tony’s name had popped on the screen that day. 

“Kid, it’s me. I’m here.” Peter felt the hand on his shoulder, and he felt the world stop spinning and falling away. The ground solidified under his feet. He met Tony’s eyes and really believed he was there, he was okay. “What happened?” 

Peter couldn’t answer. He felt himself collapsing, exhaustion making it difficult to hold back the flood of emotions. Tony was there to catch him, pulling him into a hug. “I thought I could handle it. This trip...this mission …everything’s falling apart. Tony...I miss her. Missing her hurts.”

His mind turned to the grave, to the headstone. A life that brought so much life to the world reduced to just a name, “May Parker.” She died during the five years. Peter hadn’t even been there for her funeral. And now he had to come back to the world without her steady force there to hold on to. He told himself he had to fight even harder, for her memory, for her legacy. 

His parents died. His uncle died. She died. He was powerless to stop it. Death didn’t discriminate. 

Tony nearly died, and he was powerless to do anything. He could still die. 

“I know kid, I know.” Tony held him close. “It’s going to be okay now. We’re going to fix this.” 

“How?” 

Tony pulled away to meet his eyes. “We’re going to figure that out. We can’t fix everything, but we can fix this. You’re Spiderman, I’m Iron Man, there’s nothing we can’t do.” 

Somehow Peter found himself smiling. “You’re retired. Pepper would kill me if I let you do anything.” 

“Right after her and I kill Tony.” Happy’s voice came from the jet. “Come on, geniuses, time to save the world again.” 

Tony kept an arm around his shoulders as they walked on to the quinjet. 

And Peter started to believe in hope again. 

  
  
  
  



	2. Legacy

Chapter 2: 

"Ah," Peter winced as happy continued to stitch up his shoulder, "Ouch." 

Happy adjusted the needle. "I thought you had super strength?'

"It still hurts," Peter muttered, looking over at Tony. He'd been quiet for a few minutes now, looking out at the window and the Tulip field outside. Peter could tell he was struggling with something, and that he was angry. 

"Careful Happy," Tony said softly, sitting down in the chair next to Peter.

"I'm okay," Peter objected, seeing the worry in Tony's face.

"Okay," Tony rested his hand on his good shoulder, trying to be supportive. 

Happy grimaced, "Alright, kid, just try to relax. Almost done." 

_Relax? How can I relax when the world is falling apart around me?_

"Argh, my god!" Peter flinched away in pain. 

"Relax!"

Peter threw his hands up, walking away. "Don't tell me to relax Happy! How can I relax when I messed up so bad?" He turned to Tony, feeling so desperately lost. "I trusted Beck, right? I thought he was my friend and...I gave him what you entrusted to me. I couldn't live up to your legacy." He stared blankly down at the floor. "And now he's going to kill my friends and half of Europe, and that's...on me. So please, do not tell me to relax." Peter groaned, exhaustion and anxiety pulling at his heart, and buried his head in hands. The thought occurred to him that he was close to crying. "I'm sorry Happy, I shouldn't...I shouldn't have snapped at you. I just feel...like I'm letting everyone down." 

Happy sighed, sitting down in a chair across from them. "It's okay, kid." 

"I just...really miss her," Peter turned to Tony, "And I can't help but feel...absolutely helpless. I couldn't save my parents. I...I couldn't save Ben. I couldn't save May. You almost died...and there was nothing I could have done about that. Now my friends could die, and that's on me. Everywhere I go...everyone is asking who's going to continue the legacy you started...Tony. Everyone's asking who's going to be the next Iron Man. I...I don't know if that's me, Tony. I'm not...Iron Man, I'm not...you. I'm not...good enough. I'm not good enough at this to be an avenger." 

Tony grimaced. "Look, Peter, you're not Iron Man. You're never going to be Iron Man. Nobody could live up to that, not even me. So many people always saw...the six of us as some grand symbol of hope. Like we could do no wrong. The Avengers were meant to come together to see if we could become something...more." He reached out to Peter, resting his hand on his shoulder. "But we were never anything more than a group of humans. Well...humans and one god, but that's not the point. We second guess everything we've ever done. Frankly, we're a mess. We tore ourselves apart with mistakes. I'm the worst of us. I've made so many mistakes in my life. But you know which decision I never second-guessed, never doubted for a second that I was doing the right thing?" 

"What?" 

"Picking you." Tony pointed at his chest. "Not Spiderman. You. You're the best of all of us, Peter. I don't think I would have risked what I did in that fight if I didn't know you we're going to be here, no matter what happened. I knew, I believed, I trusted that you would always keep up the fight. I knew you'd bee here to protect the world, to make the world a better place. Not that you would never make mistakes, in fact, I counted on you making mistakes. I didn't leave Legacy to the next Iron Man, I left Legacy to the next Tony Stark. I'm just another human Peter. All of us, even the avengers, are human. But have we ever given up before, have we ever backed down?" 

"No." Memories of all his failures ran through Peter's minds like stabbing, twisting knives. Somewhere he felt like just a scared little kid, trapped under the collapsed warehouse, struggling to breathe. 

Tony smiled. "We keep fighting. Whatever it takes. And you're not alone, Peter. If I go out into the field again Pepper will kill me--"

"I will too," Happy interjected. 

"--but I'll be right by your side the whole time." 

"Yeah," Peter found himself nodding, almost unconsciously. He felt something, not unlike hope forming in his heart. 

"Your friends are in trouble, nobody but us is going to be able to do anything, your tech is missing, what are we going to do about it?" Tony raised his eyebrow. 

Peter met his eyes with determination. "We're going to kick his ass." 

Happy frowned, "But what are we going to do...right now. Like specifically what are we going to do because we've been hovering over a tulip field for the last fifteen minutes." 

"Uh, right." Peter jumped to his feet, feeling his superstrength pushing past the exhaustion with a wave of adrenaline. "I can't call them because he's tracking their phones uh...Happy, give me your phone." 

"My cell phone?" 

"Yeah." 

"Okay," Happy handed the phone over, still confused, "Here." "What's your password?"

"Password." 

Peter frowned at him. "No, what is your password." 

"Password, the word, spelled out." 

Tony raised his eyebrow. "You're the head of security and your password is...password?" 

"I don't feel good about it either Tony." 

Peter felt himself smile for just a second at their banter. Flash's Instagram loaded, and he felt his heart skip a beat when he saw MJ in the background. A newfound sense of determination and stability entered his nerves and felt his hands stop shaking. "They're in London." "Okay," Happy took his phone back. 

"Yeah," Peter turned to Tony. "I need a suit." 

Tony smiled, pushing a button on the side of the quinjet interior. "Suit?" A display opened, showing a miniature version of the lab they had spent so many hours in the compound, in a time that seemed a lifetime ago. 

"Okay, um," Peter walked over to the display. "Bring up everything you have on spiderman." He smiled as the various suits and prototypes they had worked on years ago popped up. 

Tony walked over, finding himself smiling with pride. Only Morgan and Peter could really make him smile like that. "Open file 17-AA." A newer version of Peter's first suit popped up on the screen. 

"You were going to make me...another suit?" Peter looked at him, a bit confused. 

"It was meant to be a surprise, but yeah. Are we going to make this, or not?" 

Peter turned back to the screen, smiling to himself as he remembered that there were still people in the world who cared, who were looking out for him. He really wasn't alone. "Yeah open those two, no, no," Various suit designs popped up on the screen until he waved them off. They both turned at the sound of Happy's chuckle. "What?" 

"Nothing," Happy smiled. "You two take care of the suit, I'll take care of the music." 

Back in black started to play over the speakers. 

"Don't you dare," Tony said before Peter had even opened his mouth. 

"I love Led Zeppelin!" Peter smiled as he brought up web shooter configurations on screen. 

Tony shook his head, but Peter knew he couldn't help but smile at his running joke. For the moment, everything was going to be okay. He might have fallen, but there was someone to catch him. They might both eventually hit rock bottom, but there would be people around them to help them stand. 

For the moment, he wasn't lost in grief anymore. He wasn't drowning. Tony had pulled him to the surface and helped him remember that he could swim. 

A realization hit Peter as he felt Tony's hand rest on his shoulder. They were all stronger together because they were a family. Tony, his family, his friends, Pepper, Happy, even the other avengers, were all a family. There was no other word for it. They fought together because they were family because together they were stronger. He didn't have to constantly be afraid of their deaths, because they would all always do their best to watch each other's backs. Because they were family. They would make it through. 

And even on the darkest of days that was enough. _That would always be enough._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was originally going to be a one shot, but it is a one shot no longer. In the coming chapter we will be seeing a certain someone get punched in the face, I promise you that. If anyone is interested in beta reading please message me on tumblr here https://www.tumblr.com/blog/captaintomatofreak  
> Thanks for reading, I hope you're enjoying this. Comment if you like or dislike, I'm entirely open to any feedback or criticism you have.


	3. The Jump

Chapter 3: The Jump

"You know you could have called me sooner, right?" Tony closed the last configuration, letting the machines finish their work on the new suit, and turned to face Peter. "Why didn't you call me sooner?" 

Peter grimaced, a little afraid to meet his eyes. A knot of guilt was forming in his stomach."I didn't want to bother you," He muttered, half under his breath, "I thought I could handle it on my own...and I made the mistake of trusting...him. You've already done so much...for me...for the whole...universe." 

There was a part of him that was ashamed of how much help he had needed over the past few months. He remembered the feeling of absolute despair as he realized without Aunt May he had nowhere to go. He remembered the overwhelming relief as Tony had all but dragged him to a guest room at an unfamiliar house on the edge of lake after the hospital let him go. 

He remember crying, eight months ago, and Pepper and Tony had just...been there. Somehow they had both known exactly what he needed. 

He was a superhero. He was spiderman. There was a large part of him screaming he shouldn't need this much help. 

That doubt was still there, as much as he fought it. 

"And I'd do it all again if I had to," Tony rested his hand on Peter's shoulder. "You're never a bother to me, or Happy, or Pepper, or anyone, you understand? Especially not with something like this. There is a reason the Avengers have always been a team. No one expects you, no one wants you, to do this alone. Okay? Next time you've gotta call one of us right at the start if only so we know what's going on." 

"Okay," Peter felt something inside him relax, but a fragment of the doubt remained. 

Tony crossed his arms; he was serious, but not angry. "Promise?" 

"Yeah," Peter turned to face him, another fear crossing his mind. "As long as you promise me one thing: Don't put yourself in any unnecessary danger. I know you're going to insist on helping, but please stick to controlling Mark 86 remotely. You have to stay safe. For my sake, for Pepper's sake, for Morgan's sake. Please." 

_Please,_ The memories from Titan, from the Battle of Earth, from his nightmares and Beck's illusions were still too fresh in Peter's mind. _We need you._

"I promise kid, I'll be careful," He smiled, opening and closing the fingers of his prosthetic arm. "These old bones can't take much more. Remember that I'm here though, you're not going into this alone." 

Peter smiled in return. "I know...Tony." 

"Okay, Fury's got the coded message!" Happy called from the cockpit. "Your friends are at the tower bridge." 

Peter braced himself mentally for the coming fight. "Okay." 

"It was called the London bridge, but I figured it out." 

"Happy and I are gonna go scoop em up, okay kid?" Tony squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. "We're close Peter. This is going to work. We're gonna fix this." 

"We're close," He repeated, trying to cement the words in his mind.

Happy poked his head around the corner. "How's the suit coming?" 

"Almost done." 

"Good," Happy returned the cockpit, and Peter turned to Tony. 

"If...if something happens," He said, pulling the necklace out of his pocket, "I mean...nothing is going to...happen, but if something does happen, could you please give this to MJ? If nothing else...I want her to have this. I mean, it's meant for her." 

Tony's calloused hands closed around his, closing Peter's hands around the necklace. "You're going to make it back, Peter. You'll give it to yourself, okay? You got this!" 

"I got this," Peter repeated, again, hoping that speaking the words aloud could somehow cement them into reality. 

Tony crossed his arms, nodding. "Now walk me through it, the plan." 

"You're going to control Mark 86 remotely and help protect civilians, you'll be right there if I need help." Peter gestured to his suit. "I know his Illusion tech, right? All I have to do is get on the inside of the illusion then I can take it down with the webs, find him, and he's just a guy so like I can take the Legacy glasses right back." 

A brief frown creased Tony's forehead."Right. But the last time you got by a train." 

"True, but, this time...how do I explain this uh, I have like a sixth sense?" 

"Right, the Spidey-Sense. That's what you're talking about right? How you always caught the oranges Rhodey chucked at your head without looking."

Peter allowed himself a brief chuckle at the memory. After Rhodey had gotten over his initial indignation that Tony was letting a teenager be a superhero, he had chilled out about everything. Peter's ability to catch things without looking had become oddly amusing to Rhodey.

And then the memories turned sour in his mind. _The Peter-Tingle._ That's what May started calling it after Homecoming, after she found out. In a way, it had been part of her letting know everything was...okay. She helped him remember that no matter what, he was still Peter, and she would never be above teasing and joking around with him. She believed in him, she would always be there to support him, and she was giving him permission to make mistakes. To be human. 

Which was exactly what Tony had been telling him, in different words. 

Somehow, he was able to slightly smile at the memory after the first wave of sourness passed.

"Good, okay so you've got the spidey-sense, you're going to use that to get through the illusions. That's a plan. Happy and I are gonna go get your friends, they're gonna be alright. You get your suit on. You got this kid," Tony grinned, "You've got this, Peter."

Peter turned to face his suit as the machines put the finishing touches on it. As the spider symbol lowered into the front, he felt a newfound belief in himself, in the person behind that mask. "Okay, I got this, I got this." 

\---

"Alright comms check, can you hear us kid?" Tony asked from inside the quinjet, FRIDAY connecting him to Mark 86, which was now flying alongside the quinjet. 

"Yeah, it's a little loud out here, but I can hear you." Peter continued to cling to the side of the jet, remembering a little too vividly the spike of fear he had felt at Washington. Compared to the terror in his stomach as he had looked back from a literal spaceship and seen the earth falling away behind him, that seemed so trivial now. 

_ Okay, Spiderman. Okay, Peter. You've got this. You've been to space, you've fought aliens. This is just some jerk with some CGI. You've got this, you've got this, you've got this, you've-- _

_But what if you don't._ The doubt, Peter had found, would not go away. 

Peter couldn't see it, but Tony smiled, knowing that he was human, and he would be able to rise above that doubt, even if it would never truly leave. "I like the new suit kid. Let's kick some ass." 

"Thank you," He pulled himself back to the moment. He had to stay in the moment, that was the only way he was going to get through this. His friends were counting on him. 

"Whoa," Happy's voice came over the comms, "Peter, you're sure that's not real?" 

Peter gulped as the illusion came into view. _Shit. I'm never going to be able to stop something that--_

_It's not real._ Peter cut off his own thoughts. He faced countless real monsters.  This was just a nightmare. Scary, but not really able to hurt them. 

"Yeah," Peter grimaced, "It's just hundreds of time bigger than I expected." 

"Call the play Underoos," Tony asked, clearly also concerned. 

_ This is never going to work.  _

Peter shut the voice of doubt out of his mind. "Same play. We just need to get high enough, so Beck doesn't see me coming." 

_ It has too.  _

"Copy," Happy said, pulling on the controls of the plane. "Stay safe, Peter." 

"You'd better listen to that kid," Tony smiled. "You have an important necklace to deliver." 

"Copy," Peter braced himself as the plane ascended higher into the clouds. "Hey, Tony?"

"Yeah, Kid?" 

"Thank you," Peter repeated, knowing that his gratitude could never be contained in words, and hoping somehow Tony understood. 

"Always kid," Tony smiled. "Always here for you. Now seriously, go kick some ass." 

Time slowed for a heartbeat, the chaos of the world came to a standstill. Every anxiety, every doubt that his memories plagued him with crumbled away like dust. They would be there to face tomorrow. 

Tomorrow he would watch the sunrise and suffer the pains of life, the grief, anxiety, and doubt he would always have to face. Tomorrow he would get on with the business of living, of continuing onwards. 

Today he would fight for tomorrow, and he would not fight alone. 

This was a leap of faith in himself. 

Peter jumped. 


End file.
